Accurately grasping another’s inner world can improve coordination and repair; some autistic people may prefer concrete language for this process. This need may motivate perspective-taking, reflective listening, and iterative checking for understanding. Practiced well, it reduces misinterpretation and supports relational alignment.
Empathy – the ability to understand and share what another person is feeling or thinking – is crucial for working smoothly with others and for fixing relationship problems. Being truly empathetic motivates us to put ourselves in others’ shoes, listen carefully to what they say, and double-check that we’re understanding them correctly. By doing so, we greatly cut down on misinterpretations and friction. For example, studies have found that teams with higher empathy and better communication have more cohesion and perform better because members anticipate each other’s needs and clarify potential confusion. (It’s worth noting that different people may need different approaches for empathy; for instance, some autistic individuals prefer very clear, concrete communication to feel understood.) In practice, cultivating empathy leads to better “relational alignment” – everyone feels heard and on the same page, which improves coordination and conflict resolution.
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To no one's surprise I often understand myself better than anyone else. Sometimes in a crisis I'll read something I wrote a month ago and think "yes that's exactly it!" - like past me is giving empathy to future me.
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